20th Diaversary

Today marks the 20th anniversary of the day I was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes. 

I can honestly say I never thought I'd see myself where I am today, or that it'd take 20 years for me to get to this point. 

• The point of wanting to take care of myself.
• The point of complete and total surrender.
• The point of achieving normal blood sugars.

I've learned a lot in these past 20 years, and I'm immensely grateful to God for allowing me to learn all the lessons I have faced (and for living through them!).  By His grace and good will, I'm on the path to better health.  I actually care deeply about how I take care of myself, unlike my could-care-less younger, immature self.

I have to be my own advocate.  No one else is going to advocate for me.  No one else knows my body like I do.  No one else can live my life...I'm the only one who can.  I make the ultimate decisions about my care.

I have to be pro-active about ensuring the foods I eat won't cause me harm.  I have to be pro-active about ensuring that I get adequate insulin.  I have to be pro-active about ensuring the high standard of my health care.

Having diabetes has caused me to grow in so many ways. 

• I recognize my body is the Temple of the Holy Spirit, and I desire to nurture and protect it as best I can.
• I recognize that there are lots of foods (even ones that I absolutely LOVED) that are not good for me or my body, and I have willingly given them up in order to keep my blood sugar from spiking.
• I recognize that achieving normal blood sugars is the only way to ensure the prevention of future complications and secure the good, long life I want to live.

Priorities.  Surrender.  Achievement.

In that order.

If I had not set my priorities in place, I never would have been willing to surrender the things I needed to sacrifice.  If I had not sacrificed the things I once loved but were unhealthy for me, I never would have achieved normal blood sugars.

Discipline did not come easy.  It was a long, hard road but, in the end, it was well worth it.  I am now closer to my goal than I ever dreamed possible (I used to believe it was impossible!) and it's all thanks to God's patience, mercy, and grace.

Diabetes has shaped me in so many ways I don't know who I'd be without it.  I don't remember living without it, other than remembering the feeling of my whole world crashing down on me.  I was too young to understand the Lord's plan to refine and mold me into a more holy vessel, a cherished daughter.

I believe that having one autoimmune disease opened the door for me to be more trusting of Him upon my two most recent diagnoses of Celiac and Hashimoto's.  All three are connected, lifelong conditions, but because of my spiritual growth over the years, I was able to handle things better when they showed up on my doorstep.  I had answers, and I was already well on my way to treating my conditions with the care they needed.

I pray now that as I move forward toward the future and, Lord willing, child-bearing, that I will continue to praise Him on the hard days and easy days, and that I'll never forget the salvation He extended to me in my darkest hour.  Thank you, Lord, for using Diabetes to show me my need for you.    

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Happy 20th Diaversary, me!  

"For you formed my inward parts;
    you knitted me together in my mother's womb. 

 I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
Wonderful are your works;
    my soul knows it very well. 

My frame was not hidden from you,
when I was being made in secret,
    intricately woven in the depths of the earth.

Your eyes saw my unformed substance;
in your book were written, every one of them,
    the days that were formed for me,
    when as yet there was none of them."
Psalm 139: 13-16